The COVID-19 Recovery and Rehabilitation project was kindly funded by The Rayne Foundation to help care homes share with each other what they are doing to help individuals living, dying, visiting and working in care homes for older people to move on from COVID-19. This story relates to Focusing on relationships. We all need to feel a sense of security, belonging, continuity, purpose, achievement and significance to be in good relationship with others. This story focuses mainly on the sense of significance, but within it all the other senses are visible.

If you have a story to share, please email us on mhlcharity@outlook.com.

As one care home shared … 

I enjoy my work and I’ve always had my residents at the centre of all I do, as a care staff. Pre-lockdown, when I talked about significance, my prevailing thought was about residents. Now, the word ‘significance’ means a whole lot more to me. It’s taken such a difficult moment, for me to see things so differently. The lockdown and its associated stresses enabled me to truly appreciate the importance of feeling that you matter. During the lockdown, I received attention from others in a way that I have never been used to as a care worker. It seemed that suddenly I was no longer invisible. [sense of security]

 

Whilst our residents were top priority, management, colleagues, and relatives were careful to pay attention to the staff members too. A number of initiatives were put in place to support staff, but as much as these were useful, it was that consideration for us that really did it. Management did struggle with how to respond but having us in mind sent an even stronger message to me than all the things that were put in place, e.g., wellness initiatives. [sense of significance]

 

Our manger also commended us on how we adapted quickly, that it was great to see the staff taking on the challenge, demonstrating what we were capable of under such dire circumstances. It was a side of us that had never been seen before. I have to say it was difficult. Many care homes were losing staff at a rapid rate, but most of us here remained; enduring, resisting and just showing up from day to day. I was drained, fatigued, and reached a breaking point some months back. I didn’t just want to do the job anymore. In addition, having to isolate our residents and depriving them of their liberty left you with such a guilty feeling. In the end, I realised that my reaction was part of a normal response to stress, being put in such a traumatic situation, and challenged in a way that I had never been before. [sense of continuity]

 

But here again is when my sense of significance burgeons. Despite the fatigue, negative feelings and guilt, the response of residents was so overwhelmingly positive. We had regular meetings with them and you always came away from the meetings actually feeling better, because they had a deep appreciation of how hard the staff worked. They would express how happy they were and appreciative that we were doing our best with what we had at the time. [sense of achievement]

 

Also, when relatives wrote to us or called on the phone, you could feel the tenderness, a sense of genuine appreciation for being on the frontline of the pandemic. Sometimes, there are a few more negative people than the others, and it was nice to see the other relatives sticking up for us. [sense of security]

 

The pandemic has been a turning point for me. Working through it was like partnership on a much deeper level than we had previously known. I truly feel that I matter. I just feel valued. I’m not just another member of staff. We’ve got that common goal, we’re in it together, and I truly feel a sense of pride. [sense of belonging]

How do you help others feel that they matter as a person?